Inauguration Count Down Day 14
Well, it made the headline news this morning; 5,000 port-a-potties will be ready for Inauguration Day to service the expected 4 million plus crowd. Doing the math, well unless the weather does its own crowd control, let’s just say get ready for long lines. There is a great little post, “Where to Pee in D.C.” that gives strategic information on regular bathrooms, including a downloadable brochure of what I’m calling “where to go” (couldn’t resist).
So, let’s paint the scenario. Weather factors aside, you and all those folks visiting get up, have a huge breakfast (hopefully) and knowing there are no parking spaces, are roadway/bridge closures, etc., are smart enough to look at taking Metro (the D.C. subway system). How to get to your nearest Metro? Don’t even thinking of driving– taxi’s, buses or walking? You call a cab, they say there’s a two hour wait, you go back in and start having Bloody Mary’s.
You finally get on a Metro car, make it as close as you can get (mostly north of Pennsylvania Ave), make your way up the broken escalator and out into the streets. You’re only blocks from the Mall! But wait, you’re on the wrong side of Penn Ave or 16th and have to go miles around the blocked streets (literally, even if you are walking). Note, you’re not one of the few who were able to bribe their way into tickets for the wooden bleachers along the parade route. You find you can’t get closer than 10 people deep on the parade route, so you don’t even bother and go right to the Mall to park yourself within one of those Jumbo-tron screens.
Let’s recap- five or six hours after you got up, and a couple of miles walking, you have arrived at your “I’m part of the Inauguration Day” spot on the Mall. The coffee, tea and/or Bloody Mary has decided to make itself felt, so now’s the time get in line for one of those port-a-potties before your bladder gets anxious. Or, of course, you can whip out the “Where to pee” brochure and make your way to one of those. Did I mention — you better check to see if the office, museum, etc. that houses these bathrooms are open on Inauguration Day?
Washingtonian Outsider 